


Interrogation at the Gay Bar

by pollyglyph



Category: One Piece
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-15
Updated: 2019-08-15
Packaged: 2020-09-01 11:10:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20257156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pollyglyph/pseuds/pollyglyph
Summary: Kalifa and Lucci get Iceburg drunk in their search for information. (companion piece toInvestigation at the Gay Bar)





	Interrogation at the Gay Bar

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't let this idea just sit as an aside and not actually write it.

Lucci’s eyes are trained on him as Kaku approaches his target. As Lucci watches him start up a conversation with the man, he examines the performance, silently critiquing.

Kaku turns and looks back at him, smiles at him. _So needy._ A big mistake. He is so distracted by Lucci watching him that he’s letting himself get horribly sloppy. Kaku is desperate to impress him and practically begging Lucci to watch. It’s far too obvious. 

Lucci shakes his head and walks off. He has no more interest in watching such a clumsy mating ritual.

Walking through the crowded bar alone, Lucci gets looks. Interest from some, fear from the weaker ones. It was only natural. Prey, if it knew what was good for it, ran from its predator. Though some prey, oafs like Paulie for example, were stupid enough to think they were part of the pack and tried to fight him for dominance.

Lucci takes a seat at a table at the side of the room. He drinks his tequila and takes time to carefully consider his target. Picking by impulse like Kaku had done was amateurish.

A man approaches Lucci’s table. “Hey there sexy. Mind if I take a seat?”

“I’m busy. Go away,” Lucci dismisses. 

The man ducks nervously on by.

He goes over Iceburg’s profile for clues as he sits in observation. Iceburg was a man in his mid-thirties, a shipwright by trade and starting to prove himself a successful business owner. And he was the manager of the city’s highly glorified sea train, itself built by Iceburg and the rest of the workers at the shipyard Iceburg used to work for.

Iceburg was a workaholic, by all accounts, with not a great deal of time left aside for a social life. His lovers were probably few and far between in recent years. And if he’d always thrown himself into his work, perhaps there were never many at all. Just to make things more difficult for their investigation. Iceburg liked proving difficult.

He was about to run for the mayoral office for the first time this year, as if he hadn’t enough titles pinned to his name. Did he want to aid this city in an act of charity or own this city on an ego-trip?

Did they have to play the music so loud? It’s hard to even think with the heavy beat pounding in his ears.

A second man approaches him.

“Hi, what you drinking there? Can I get you another? Looks like you’re nearly empty.”

Lucci rattles his near fully melted ice and can’t even make out the satisfying clink over the music. “Tequila.”

The man goes to the bar and brings back over his drink and sets it down for him.

“Leave now,” Lucci orders, with a glare.

“Hey man, I bought you this drink! The least you could do would be to just pretend for a while you’re interested.”

“Believe me, if I was interested you’d be up against the wall already.”

“Forward. But sexy as hell.”

“The things I would do to you…”

The man gives him eyes and nods. “Go on.”

“I’d stab a hole in your chest and let you die slowly.”

“Um… not really into that sort of play.” He pulls back. “Guess you can just have that drink, I’ll be on my way.”

Lucci starts his second drink. Maybe he’d let these idiots keep buying him more. He wouldn’t have to file reports for reimbursement. Though he admits there was always some satisfaction in forcing Spandam to pay up.

Lucci is undecided on Iceburg’s motives on running for mayor. But the answer might aid a stab at his preference in the bedroom. If it was ego, Lucci felt confident assuming he was more likely a top if he desired ownership. If it was charity, then perhaps he was a bottom if he liked to serve. Though these weren’t necessarily set in stone and Iceburg was a frustrating man to read indeed.

Perhaps Kalifa had been able to determine Iceburg’s ‘type’ from their talks. He makes a point to ask her. If she didn’t know yet, that would be her next assignment.

As he continues to watch, unable to determine a target, he considers the notion that perhaps they’d made their move too soon in coming to the bar already. It feels useless to act without sufficient information. Lucci admits the investigation feels rushed and ill-considered and he’s about to leave when he hears a familiar voice nearby. Followed by another familiar voice that he’s very pleased indeed to hear.

He turns to see the two of them together in a booth drinking and laughing. His boss, _in formality only_, and Galley-La’s highly competent secretary, _her adept disguise_.

_Excellent work Kalifa. _

He gets up and goes to them.

“Oh, Lucci?” Kalifa laughs.

“Oh Lucci?” Iceburg echoes. “Well, I didn’t realise you were one of us too.”

He sounds quite drunk already. Kalifa was formidable.

Iceburg pats the spot beside him in the booth, inviting Lucci to sit down.

“More and more of Galley-La are coming out of the closet now,” Iceburg says. “Or dare I say, coming out of the woodwork?”

“Woodwork.” Kalifa laughs. “A clever pun sir.”

Lucci clears his throat. He was going to have to use that stupid voice. He was hoping to give his strained voice box a rest for the night. But he supposed it was worth tolerating the displeasure for such an opportune moment. Tonight would be their breakthrough.

“Evening boss,” Lucci coos, despite the lack of Hatori’s presence on his shoulder.

He sits down to join them.

“Still do the voice when he’s not with you.” Iceburg chuckles. “Oddly charming.”

Iceburg downs his drink. 

“Being here really takes me back a few years. I haven’t been out like this in a long time.”

“You should more often sir, it’d help take some of the weight off your shoulders,” Kalifa says.

Lucci carefully watches her expression. She is a skilled actress and convincing performer. She almost has Lucci himself convinced that her concern for him is genuine.

“You work too hard sometimes. You’re isolating yourself,” she adds.

“Maybe I do. Well, old habits die hard.” Iceburg gets up.

Kalifa stands to let him out of their booth.

“I’m getting this round,” Iceburg announces. “What would you both like?”

“I just got this one,” Lucci says, raising his glass.

“Oh, come on, it’s my treat.” Iceburg smiles. “Let’s have some fun. Shall we do cocktails or shots?”

"Very kind offer Mr Iceburg," Kalifa says, pushing up her glasses. “I am weak to a good margarita."

“Margaritas all round then,” he says, walking off.

Lucci sighs. Margaritas were a waste of good tequila.

“How did you pull off this one?” Lucci says, in his own voice.

She sits back down. “Simple really.” 

It’s all Kalifa gives for an answer. The brevity annoys Lucci. He wanted a full account.

Iceburg brings back a tray and sits back down with them. Margaritas _and_ shots. Iceburg would get himself blind drunk and they wouldn’t even have to force him.

“Cheers,” Iceburg says, raising his glass.

Lucci raises his shallow tequila back mechanically.

In the corner of his eye, Lucci spots Kaku leaving the bar with his target. Some small success at least. If nothing else it would earn him a little more sexual experience. The rookie needed it.

Kalifa taps his shoulder. “Lucci, Mr Iceburg just asked if we all want to do the shots together.” 

Lucci fumes that he let Kaku steal his attention, if even for just a brief moment. A slip like that on a mission and he could have left himself wide open for an attack. 

“Sure, you bet,” he chirps and takes up his shot glass.

Kalifa begins the countdown. “Three… two… one.”

They all knock the thick green liquid back.

Iceburg winces. “Mm well, that was stronger than I expected.”

He washes it down with a little of his cocktail.

“So has there been anyone that’s caught your eye yet then Mr Iceburg?” Kalifa asks.

“Not really. Though I admit I haven’t really taken the time to have a good look around.”

“What is your type sir if you don’t mind me asking?” she continues. “Maybe we can help out. You’ve helped me with women, perhaps I can return the favour?”

_Yes, Kalifa. Your work tonight is exemplary. _

Iceburg shrugs. “I wouldn’t say I have a specific type really. It’s more about… a connection.”

_Deflecting with a vague answer. Difficult as ever. _Somehow they will break him. 

Iceburg takes another sip. “Admittedly, picking someone up at a bar isn’t exactly something I’m well versed in.”

Lucci wonders what it will take to get him to drop his poised guard and open up. Flattery perhaps?

“I assume you’d be very popular boss,” Lucci says. “You’re very handsome.”

Iceburg laughs. He drinks. He doesn’t reply.

“Really, I mean it,” Lucci persists.

“Well, it was a generous compliment. Thank you Lucci.”

Lucci waits. He knocks back some more of his tequila.

“Have you had many lovers in the past?” Kalifa asks.

Iceburg keeps drinking until he reaches the bottom of his glass, then seems to steel himself.

“Ok, I’ll tell you. This is a difficult story mind you. Not exactly one that seems suited to a fun night out.”

Both Lucci and Kalifa’s attention are drawn squarely to him.

“My first lover was a work mate. A shipwright too, so we had a lot in common. We worked together every day building ships and the sea train from dawn to dusk, so, mm well, it happened quite naturally really. One day it just sort of happened. It was always a little rocky, had been from the start, but pleasant in its own way.”

Iceburg stares down at the table. “But he died. Killed in an accident. Ironically with the sea train itself. And then I lost him.”

Lucci tries his best to appear concerned, but the revelation is a goldmine. Sure, they wouldn’t be able to find the man for intel if he was dead, but the story still gave them much more about Iceburg that would be useful to them. A painful history and trigger points.

They would look into the records of his old workplace in search of the name of the man, though it probably wasn’t all that important now anyway if they had no need to seek him out.

“Oh,” Kalifa says. She places a hand on Iceburg’s shoulder. “I’m very sorry to hear that. I can see why you might have been reluctant to tell me before. It must have been difficult.”

Iceburg hugs her. It doesn’t look to Lucci like this is the first time she has comforted him. Perhaps this was what he was weak to. Fluffy things like compassion, friendship and emotions. Kalifa clearly had his pulse.

Iceburg nods. “It was. But let’s not talk about that anymore. It’ll spoil the evening.”

He gets up again. “Any more drinks?”

“I’ll come with you sir,” Kalifa says, taking his arm.

“Sure, we’ll go together.” Iceburg’s smile is strained.

They leave Lucci alone and almost as soon as they do, another man dares to wander over his way.

“My friend over there said you were into some kinky bdsm shit,” he says, thumbing over his shoulder. “You looking for a sub? I’m up for that.”

“Prey never approaches a predator unless it’s stupid. Are you stupid, prey?”

“Yes… yes. I am.”

“Then you must be punished. And go do it yourself. You’re not worthy of your master’s precious time and effort.”

“Oh yes, of course master!”

Lucci shakes his head as the man bows deeply to him and leaves hurriedly. _Too easy._ They had all been too easy. Even Iceburg had folded very quickly. But at least the interrogation was proceeding well.

Kalifa and Iceburg return. Iceburg still looks a little shaken.

They sit back down and Iceburg slides a fresh glass Lucci’s way.

“Another tequila for you Lucci. Kalifa says it’s your drink of choice.”

Lucci forces himself. “Thank you boss.”

“I suppose old habits repeat themselves,” Iceburg begins again. “Because my next lover was a co-worker too.”

Lucci doesn’t know why Iceburg is giving everything up so easily now, but intel was intel whether hard earned or a little more freely given.

“I met him at the next shipyard I worked at. It took me a while to be open to it. Well, losing a lover you close yourself off a bit and I still wasn’t quite ready for another relationship. But he kept pursuing me and I eventually agreed. It was actually very healing. It lasted a few peaceful years, but then it ended amicably. We’re still friends now.”

“Does he still work as a shipwright?” Kalifa gasps. “Oh does he work at Galley-La now? Do we know him?” 

_Calm Kalifa. You’re getting too keen now, don’t ruin your good night’s work. _

“Well, I don’t really like to kiss and tell. But he is working at Galley-La.”

“Oh this suspense is too much sir,” Kalifa huffs. “Tell us already.”

“You won’t spread this around?” he whispers. Iceburg hushes his voice so low, and the music’s so loud that they have to read his lips. It’s a good thing they are both well trained.

Lucci’s a little surprised Iceburg still has enough wits about him to attempt discretion with the amount of alcohol that was probably in his system.

“I swear,” Kalifa says.

Reluctantly, Lucci nods to pacify him too.

Iceburg’s leans in. “Lulu.”

He sits back again and shrugs. “Unfortunately that’s really all there is to tell of my love life. Short, but sweet. In a way.”

The table falls silent. They all awkwardly nip at their drinks.

One of the men they were looking for was dead and the other had been under their noses the whole time. There’d been nothing telling at all in Iceburg and Lulu’s interactions. But maybe Lucci hadn’t been paying enough attention. His ‘comrades’ at Dock One always seemed too odd and simple to be in any way significant.

Lucci struggles to hold back a satisfied smirk. They had just secured the name of their next target.

The rest of the evening is daft and insignificant. They all dance a little at Kalifa’s insistence. Lucci allows her this. It was all thanks to her hard work they had gotten this far.

Lucci has to keep swatting men away like pesky flies. There’s one that almost interests him, but he’s sure it's just the tequila talking. In a sober state of mind he wouldn’t touch the man with a barge pole, so he listens to that careful reasoning. 

The night ends with them helping Iceburg home.

Iceburg and Kalifa sing some caterwauled duet together as they walk the cobbled streets back to the Galley-La HQ. Probably from some musical they’d been to together. Lucci knows they go to these types of events, theatres and the like from time to time. All part of buttering him up. And how well indeed she had buttered him up. Lucci is deeply impressed. Much less though with their pitchy musical number.

She is careful taking him in to the company headquarters. Careful helping him to his room. She could forget he’s their target if she wasn’t careful. 

“Goodnight you two, thanks for a good night. Well, we should do it again some time,” Iceburg says, pushing open his bedroom door.

“I agree,” Kalifa smiles. “Goodnight sir.”

“Night boss,” Lucci coos.

They head out the door and as they begin the walk back to their respective apartments, Lucci decides to have a word with Kalifa.

“You did very well tonight. Almost too well. You’re starting to, dare I say, grow fond of him, aren’t you?”

“A bit. But he’s certainly a much nicer man to have for a boss than that utter fuckwit Spandam.”

“Such language,” Lucci replies.

“Anger got the better of me.”

“Understandable. We all hate him. But be careful. We will take Iceburg down someday. Possibly take him out. I wouldn’t want you getting in our way.”

Kalifa adjusts her glasses. “Of course not.”

“See to it you don’t.”

“My apartment is this way. So goodnight Lucci.”

She laughs, walking away. She starts singing the same song to herself that her and Iceburg sang together earlier.

Lucci shakes his head. He had done that an awful lot this evening. 


End file.
